? of the day: Now that I am of a certain age & seeing as I reside in the vestibule of God’s Waiting Room, I wonder: Are there any Adult’s Only Trailer Parks? I know your immediate answer certainly, but I say Nay Nay, not those fancy ones, where everyone is required to maintain their space w/garden gnomes, pin wheels & gazing balls filling their lush gardens. Where the well manicured lawns sit above mailboxes that proudly display license plates from the home state & the homes are called “manufactured housing”.
I mean a trailer park, my friend. (I sounded like McCain!) You know the one, it is filled with run down mobile homes, jacked up on cinder blocks. The awning that once hid the offensive blocks (if any at all) is now broken w/peeling paint. The towing bar is still in place, rusting & hazardous. The grass lawns are patchy & dead in most places, exposing sandy dirt, and filled w/weeds. Standing in the door, gossiping w/each other are 2 old battleaxes, each wearing a dirty house coat/dress, with a torn pocket & a broken snap exposing most delicate of areas. One pocket is stuff w/Kleenex & the other a pack of Marlboro Lites. One old bat has her hair up in pink plastic rollers & the other one has stringy gray hair that is definitely what one would call “flyaway”. The sound of multiple meowing is coming from the trailer across the lane. That is where the cat lady lives. People hate even walking by it. Even though the windows are shut tight & the old lady only comes out at night, the smell of cat urine wafts through the holes in the floor of the rotting trailer.
2 doors down lives one of many gin soaked WWII &/or Viet Nam vets, still wearing the once white undershirt they had on the day their wife died. It has holes in it & is thin from many washings. Their khaki colored slacks hang loose around asses that are wasted away, poop stains are visible. The old coots spend their time in their recliners watching TV & reliving their glory years. Should anyone ever have grandchildren to visit in the park, they grumble & fuss, as if they lived in Shangri-la. The only pot “luck” in the trailer is when the old Viet Nam Vet finds his lost stash &it still has something in it other than stems & seeds.
Does this 55+ park exist? If so, please send me the info. You see, now that I am of a certain age I am scouting out my retirement villa, where I can reside without fear of being robbed of my millions. (I am going to stuff all my cash in fire resistant cans, that fit into the holes in cinder blocks. I will then put them under the trailer to prop up the sagging floor.. Damn it to hell, I didn’t mean to tell you that! I don’t need your help after all, I will find the place on my own.
(c) Karrel Buckingham 2010